I almost had a panic attack – and I don't mean that metaphorically. It was an overwhelming mix of fear and helplessness, a moment where I felt utterly out of control. Until that point, I had never experienced anything quite like it.
My son, Will, who's 12 years old, and I decided on a whim to leave Columbus, Indiana, this past Monday morning for a spontaneous trip to the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. After a long seven-hour drive, we stopped in Mackinaw City before continuing our journey to Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore. At the public beach, we were in awe of the stunning four-mile suspension bridge connecting the landmasses. We spent time skipping rocks, and eventually, Will even bravely jumped into the frigid waters of Lake Huron for a swim.
Despite the apparent enjoyment of the moment, my mind was racing with thoughts. The trip was entirely unplanned, and I couldn't help but worry about where we would sleep, what we'd do, and how everything would unfold. Even though I had brought a tent, uncertainty weighed heavily on me. As we finished dinner at an ordinary pizza place, which surprisingly turned into Will's favorite topic of conversation for the next couple of days, an overwhelming feeling of uncertainty crept in, accompanied by the fear of letting Will down with what I thought would be a lackluster "boy's trip." I asked Will to wait in the car while I made a phone call.
Thankfully, my wife answered, and I poured out my feelings to her. She offered me a much-needed perspective, reminding me that every moment we spend together is meaningful to Will. For him, it's not about grand plans or constant entertainment; all that matters is that he gets to share quality time with me.
And she was right.
I had unknowingly fallen into the trap of thinking that I had to constantly entertain Will to ensure he had a good time. Despite all my reflections on living in the present and cherishing the small things, I had lost sight of what truly matters. Every activity we do together, no matter how simple, holds immense significance for Will simply because we are doing them together. It won't be about whether I planned everything perfectly or managed to keep him entertained. The memories he'll treasure the most will be the moments we share, side by side.
Will and Me in Lake Superior and the song we listened to over a hundred times that captured the mood of this trip.
When I asked him, Will said that the best part of our trip was spending time together on a small, secluded beach, swimming for hours in Lake Superior. It was a powerful reminder that what we need most is not a multitude of things to keep us occupied but rather presence. It’s the bond we share that will carry with them throughout their lives.
Peace,
Brandon
What you have written about trying to impress Will so your trip would be memorable is what grandparents experience. You want the few days that you have your grandchildren to be able to say, I love going to my grandmas and grandpas, we have so much fun. But, just being together is what they will remember, little things. One thing I remember the most when going to mine was grandma knew I loved bbq beans and the little potatoes she had. They were small, with the peeling on them, boiled then fried. I remember that well. Grandpa taking me rabbit hunting in the winter after a snow, tracking the rabbit and finding it hunkered down. Time, is the most valuable whether with family or mom and dad. He will never forget that trip