Unmasking the Ego

The Path to Growth Through Candid Feedback

About a decade ago, I received an unexpected email from a young woman I deeply respect. She expressed appreciation for my contributions to our community but also raised concerns about some careless words I had used on a recent occasion. Looking back at that email and the subsequent conversation it sparked, I realized it shed light on a broader issue—our resistance to accepting honest feedback.

Why are we so reluctant to let others speak truth into our lives?

It's a common human tendency to be thin-skinned when it comes to receiving constructive criticism or healthy feedback. In a posture of self-preservation, we often react defensively to fortify our egos. We want to protect our self-image and avoid being exposed or feeling vulnerable.

The truth is, we tend to resist hearing the truth about ourselves because it can be uncomfortable and challenging. We may fear that accepting our flaws will make us appear weak or imperfect. It's as if we've built protective walls around ourselves to shield us from anything that might threaten our carefully curated image.

But this resistance to feedback can hinder our personal growth and harm our relationships. When we shut ourselves off from honest input, we miss valuable opportunities to learn and improve. It takes humility and self-awareness to recognize that none of us are perfect, and there's always room for growth.

So, how can we overcome this resistance and become more open to people speaking truth into our lives? It starts with self-reflection and a willingness to acknowledge our imperfections. Instead of viewing feedback as a personal attack, we should see it as a opportunity for growth.

Identifying those individuals we trust and respect, who can provide honest feedback with kindness, is essential. Who are the people willing to ask tough questions and hold us accountable in a supportive way? These are the individuals whose input we should value most and seek out.

When faced with constructive feedback, we should strive to respond with an open heart rather than defensiveness. It's a process of shedding our protective layers and recognizing that embracing the truth, even when it's uncomfortable, is a path to personal growth and stronger relationships.

In my story above, my friend’s words initially stung quite a bit. But I sat with them. I eventually humbled myself and considered her perspective on my careless words. I acknowledged my mistakes, sought reconciliation, and expressed gratitude to my friend for her concern. In response, I found understanding, compassion, and forgiveness.

In our complex world, we can benefit greatly from people who are open to hearing the truth, free from ego and self-preservation instincts. Let us recognize that true growth begins with acknowledging our imperfections and embracing personal development with open hearts.

Peace,

Brandon