The Myth of This is Who I am and Who I Will Always Be
The Myth of This is Who I am and Who I Will Always Be
A Call to Personal Growth and Transformation
I know I am introverted. Not because Myers and Briggs told me, but because I feel it in my body, and I have felt it for as long as I can remember.
Don’t believe my manufactured social media persona, my confident tone in writing, or ease in public speaking. I am uncomfortable talking to people whom I either do not know or only marginally know. I am not a chit-chatter. In fact, I fail frequently when people try to chit-chat with me. I get really weird and awkward. I am almost fifty, so I have had time to come to terms with this. Confessionally, if I see you in public, I may not come up and talk to you. Trust me. It’s not you. It’s me.
Don’t think I am a complete psycho yet. Many years ago, I saw a person I thought I marginally knew. I walked up to this person’s table after my meal and said hi. They looked at me quizzically and gave me a side eye. They didn’t know who I was.
For a poor, introverted soul like me, that was death. Finding the courage to extend myself like that, only to be embarrassed. Woof.
Some of you who know me in real life know that I am in sales. Don’t worry. I do great in that profession. Ninety-nine percent of salespeople are extroverts, and my customers have deeply appreciated having someone with a different style and approach.
But I digress.
So what’s the point of all this?
I love being me. I love my unique personality and disposition. I wouldn’t trade being me for anything in the world. I can be a blessing to others and to you by simply being me.
But I also recognize how much richness I miss in unsuspecting moments, in spontaneous encounters, and unplanned conversations. I know I could continue to hide in this isolated cocoon and use my INFJ personality as a self-fulfilling prophecy. I could use the excuse of 'this is who I am and who I will always be.' But the truth is that I want to grow out of this metaphorical cocoon and be able to find the hidden gems in people and our conversations, even if there is some passing discomfort in the process.
In the next week or two, I want to share some stories of how this venture into personal development is going.
Questions
How can I embrace discomfort as a catalyst for personal growth and development, regardless of the specific nature of my perceived limitations?
I would deeply appreciate you answering the two poll questions below. If you did it last week, no need to answer again. Thanks for helping me in my future planning!
Peace,
Brandon
Eat some Hot Peppers 🌶.
One of my other friends. He might also have the same INFJ traits spoke on his Sunday Morning live about doing a little suffering.. Oh boy I guess I will be doing a little stepping out of my comfort zone.
I practice "the hot pepper protocol" when a respiratory virus tries to invade. Hot peppers wake up the system and cause an immune response. I believe it shortens the invasion time.
In the same way talking to a stranger might do for my psyche. I would rather let the written word speak for me. I can edit that. But sfter all the edits it loses something. Polishing might add understanding but it leaves the receiver with a less interesting snapshot. I can't tell you how hard it is for me to be me in conversation. The urge to polish is overwhelming. I am almost frozen. A little suffering will thaw the psyche for sure. I encourage a little suffering. Go on shake in your shoes it is good for the sole.
A lifetime ago, MB pegged me as an ENFJ, but life has irrevocably changed me. If I could alter the test, I’d be an ANFJ. That is to say I’m ambivert. I have excellent people skills but I need a lot of alone time - in quiet and nature.
It will be interesting to track with your pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.